Author Archives: Asmita Paranjape

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Experts Report Fun Part Of College Over Now

WESTWOOD, CA  — Popular perception of the American college experience as portrayed by the media is what experts describe as “fun” for “young people”. However, now that the first week or so of the new quarter has passed, researchers out…

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Rain Stopped

WESTWOOD, CA — It dry out. Was wet. Not wet now. Rain for so long. Sad. Clouds. No more.

satyr-dismantle

Trump Decimates Republican Party, Makes America Great Again

WASHINGTON, DC — Sources just confirmed the embarrassing demise of the Republican party. Following what political historians are calling Trump’s “Pussygate” a few weeks ago, several Republican leaders jolted awake from their Reagan-era wet-dreams and publicly renounced their support for…

An American cartoonist in 1888 depicted John Bull (England) as the octopus of imperialism, grabbing land on every continent.  
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Reports Show Genealogy Only Fun For White People

WESTWOOD —  A report out of the UCLA Historical Sciences Lab indicates genealogy might only be fun for white people. The study found that many family lineages across the globe have been destroyed by European explorers throughout history. Second-year political…

SATYR- Cruz

Ted Cruz Suspends Campaign, Only Likable Move So Far

HOUSTON, TX–After suffering an ignominious defeat in Indiana, Senator and slippery blobfish Ted Cruz dropped out of the presidential race, leaving racist circus peanut, Donald Trump, as the GOP Nominee. Since the announcement of his surrender yesterday, polls show that,…