Author Archives: Elle Woods

16291711015_8d30695588

Daily Bruin Congratulates Self Over Spotlight Oscar

WESTWOOD — On Sunday night, shortly after Spotlight, the movie about investigative journalism at the Boston Globe, won the Oscar for Best Picture, Daily Bruin staff held a celebratory party, patting themselves on the back for the award. The announcement…

SATYR- Larry David

Checked Out Voter Thinks Larry David is Running

NEVADA – Nevada resident Kent Bradley was confused and taken aback this past Saturday after attempting to vote for Larry David in the Nevada Democratic Caucus only to find the two options on the ballot were Hillary Clinton and Bernie…

FullSizeRender

Complete List of Ben and Jerry’s 2016 Candidate Flavors

Ice Cream conglomerate, Ben & Jerry’s, has decided to throw its hat in the political arena this winter, releasing several ice cream flavors specifically themed around the 2016 presidential election. After the initial release of “Bernie’s Yearning,” a new Ben…

Realistic Experation Dates

FDA Debuts “Realistic Expiration Dates”

WASHINGTON D.C. – The Food and Drug Administration released an updated list of expiration labels this week in an effort to provide more “consumer-friendly” labels to shoppers. The labels were made, in part, to help individuals realize when they actually…

LyftLA

Lyft and Uber Team up to Create Gameshow

LOS ANGELES – This week, popular television network, The CW, announced the launch of a new game show premiering in the spring titled UberWeird. The show will test how long passengers will stay in Uber/Lyft cars with drivers who are…

SATYR-Middle-Seat

Middle Seat Now “Roomy” for Triple Resident

WESTWOOD – After spending the past four months living in a triple dorm room on the Hill, first-year philosophy student, Sophie Loch, says she now feels prepared to sit in the middle seat on her plane back to New Jersey…

summer-sunshine-alcohol-drink

Student Tries IPA, Decides to Open Brewery

LOS ANGELES – After drinking his first IPA at a UCLA Radio party fall quarter, first-year ethnomusicology student, Brad McLintoc, knew he had found his passion: brewing. McLintoc, 18, said up until that party, the only beer he’d ever consumed was…

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

ASK Peer Counselors Shuts Down Despite Shocking Discovery

LOS ANGELES — In a school-wide email sent Monday morning, UCLA’s administration announced that the ASK Peer Counselor service would be discontinued at the end of fall quarter. “ASK Peer Counselors receive rigorous, costly training to prepare them to handle…