WESTWOOD- After throwing the controversially themed “Kanye Western” party on Tuesday night, members of UCLA’s Sigma Phi Epsilon chapter have publicly apologized stating that they are “sorry that everyone took it as such a big fuckin’ deal.”
“We wanted our attendees to have fun and sort of adopt the chill aspects of black culture for a little bit,” said a senior member who asked not to be named. “So it’s just like wowww relaaaax.”
Sig Ep feels as though they and other fraternities have been unfairly categorized as ignorant and racist and want to change the public’s perception. According to other sources, rejected proposed themes included “Kendrick Lamartians, Lil Wayne’s World, Soulja Boy Scouts, and 50 Centaurs.”
“We really wanted to do 50 Centaurs but we figured it might be too hard to pull off the horse part,” admits one member.
But through all of this, Sig Ep still believes they are the ones hurt the most in all of this.
“#FratLivesMatter, you know?” said sophomore Business-Economics major and Sig Ep member Max Taylor. “Like, I guess it hurts people’s feelings or whatever, but we were just trying to show our appreciation for Yeezy. I hope with this new party we can extend a hand in brotherhood, or perhaps “brothahood,” you feel me?”
In a bid to bury the hatchet, UCLA’s Afrikan Student Union is personally invited to attend with one caveat.
“No white face, though,” warns Taylor. “That would be super racist.”♦