Tag: usac

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USAC Representatives Study Abroad In Russia

WESTWOOD— Government ties to Russia persist as reports reveal several USAC members recently studied abroad in Moscow, Russia. According to USAC General Representative Justin Jackson, the trip was taken “only to fulfill GE credits.” However, the information leak has prompted…

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Rating this Year’s USAC Candidates

We here at Satyr understand that you have a busy schedule, and that you don’t have the time or concern to understand where your tuition money is going. Instead of wasting your life actually researching candidates, we are here to give…

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Student with 19p On Power Hungry Rampage

LOS ANGELES— After second-year economics student Jonathan Humbert upgraded to the 19-premium meal plan this year, friends and family reported that he has become unrecognizable as a “power-hungry jerk.” “After hearing Jonny complain about not having enough swipes last year,…

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USAC General Rep 4 to Start New Slate

LOS ANGELES— In a surprising move, General Representative 4 Sachin Medhekar has declared his decision to leave the ¡Bruin Satyrists! party, to start his own slate. “I was really disappointed by my performance in the election,” said the third-year Computer…

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USAC Candidates Protect Right Of Rich To Student Government

LOS ANGELES—For the second year in a row, the majority of Undergraduate Students Association Council (USAC) candidates have united in their cause for the endowed to have a fair chance in student government elections. Of the 30 candidates running for…